so quiet




This is the end of the book.

I’ll always be a great supporter of the Foreign Legion. The last refuge of the Doomed. Reality! You see, all of my peers, in joining the armynavyairforcemarines, are in the whole mess mainly for the college dough. Lunacy! Learning to kill and maim should be a lifelong career – not just a weekend thing! Now, the Foreign Legion, there’s the best – the men there really know what they’re in for. Undeniably. If I were ever to hook up, it’d have to be with them, without a doubt. It’s all or nothing! I should have joined the Foreign Legion.

Lick that floor, you idiot! Do you know what it means to grovel? (a kick in the ass) You fucking pacifist! We don’t go in for that kind of cocksucking here!!! (captain, captain, there are queers in the camp! how do you know, son? because the major’s dick tastes like shit!) You are shit, you know that? Do you know that, you filth?!? I bet you don’t! Answer me, you twisted bastard!! I’ll learn you to follow orders, putain!!! It would have been relatively peaceful. Still, as it is now, I’ve done nothing more – no thing less – than to present myself as any decent adult human being does. A man in his own words. My innards have roiled disgustingly under the onslaught of my honesties – I’ve chewed my guts up for this! A real venting of the spleen. And there may be something here, behind the storied life – or, maybe not. I do not care for Coca-Cola prose. Shut up! Shut up! You’ve already said that, don’t do it again! Tell us the truth, you stupid! The truth! The Truth! There’s no way around it.***

It was an ordinary morning. Breaking the fast – a solitary affair. So too the rudimentary bathroom rigamarole. I can’t help it. I need a walk. The fresh air will clean the attic.

Will you come with me? Good. I’d really enjoy it – I think I need to talk with you. Well, that of course goes without saying, that I think. I have so much to say. But now, I’d really appreciate the company. I hate walking alone. Don’t you?

Step up here. How about this view? Something spectacular, hey? The sun’s almost up, you can just barely see the semenary from here. Here, let’s walk up this way, so we can see the valley better. The whole thing. That’s it. I don’t maen to be personal, and I’ll tell you something – did you know that you have ring around the collar?

Why’s it so quiet? Was it something I said?

No, I don’t smoke. They slip it over my head. And?

My name is X. You’ve heard of X Brands, the actor? Haven’t you? Maybe not. Even if you’ve never heard of Monsieur Brands, I’ve still his name. I’ve still his name, hey? Hey, you, you too! Hm? Now who’s the fucker? Now? Now?


zineeeeDavid Cotner